From Stuck to Steady: How I Integrate CIMBS, Attachment Work, CBT, Polyvagal, and Self-Compassion for Real Change

Prologue: Maya’s Two Speeds

 🧠⚡⏸️ (Overdrive vs. Shutdown)

When “Maya” first sat across from me, she described two speeds: worry on overdrive and a shut-down so heavy she couldn’t get out of bed. She’d tried “be more positive,” but white-knuckling thoughts doesn’t rewire a nervous system. What finally moved the needle was weaving four evidence-based approaches inside a CIMBS frame so her whole brain-body could shift, stabilize, and grow.

CIMBS (Complex Integration of Multiple Brain Systems)

 🧠🔗🧠 (Multiple brain systems, linked)

What it is: A precise, experiential way to activate healthy circuits (courage, care, curiosity) while dialing down threat circuits (shame, fear, collapse). Instead of arguing with symptoms, CIMBS runs short, targeted sequences that help the right networks fire together long enough to wire together.

Why it matters: Change sticks when the body, emotions, and thinking brain move in the same direction. CIMBS is the conductor that coordinates the orchestra.

4-pillars of making change

The Four Pillars I Combine—And Why

1) Polyvagal-Informed Regulation (state first, then skills)

If your nervous system thinks you’re in danger, your prefrontal cortex goes dim. We start by shifting state—from fight/flight or freeze toward safe/social—using breath pacing (inhale 4, exhale 6), soft eye gaze, voice prosody, and posture cues that signal safety. Once Maya’s body believes “I’m safe enough,” her skills actually land.

Try this: 2 minutes of 4–6 breathing + gentle neck/shoulder mobilization. Then ask: “Do I feel 2–3% safer?”

2) Attachment-Based Repair (safety with people)

 🤝💛 (Secure bond)

Attachment shapes how we handle stress and closeness. In session, we create micro-moments of secure relating—clear boundaries + warm attunement—so Maya’s system learns a new template with people: “I can be seen, set limits, and still belong.” That reduces all-or-nothing reactivity and boosts follow-through at home and work.

Try this: Script one bid for connection (“Can we talk at 7:15 for 10 minutes?”). Specific + time-bound = safer.

Bid for connection

3) Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (make thinking helpful again)

 🗺️📝➡️ (Trigger → Thought → Action map)

Once state is steadier and the relationship feels safe, CBT helps map triggers → thoughts → feelings → actions and run tiny behavioral experiments. We stop debating “Is the thought true?” and test what’s useful. Quick wins build self-efficacy and momentum.

Try this: Pick one anxiety loop (e.g., “email from boss → ‘I’ll fail’ → avoid”). Design a 15-minute experiment (“Reply with 2 sentences; walk 3 minutes after”). Log results.

4) Self-Compassion (Kristin Neff: mindfulness, common humanity, self-kindness)

Mini-Illustration: 🫶 (Kindness as a skill)

Shame freezes change. Self-compassion isn’t letting yourself off the hook; it’s staying on your own team under stress. We practice:

• Mindfulness: “This is hard.”

• Common Humanity: “Others feel this too.”

• Self-Kindness: “What helps me take the next right step?”

Try this 60-second script: “This is tough. I’m not alone. What’s one small kind action I can take now?”

Self-compassion

How It Comes Together in Session (Maya’s Arc)

 🧩⏱️ (Short, stacked sequences)

Sessions 1–3: State & Safety

• Polyvagal downshift: 4–6 breathing, soft gaze, prosodic coaching.

• Attachment micro-repair: Practice ask, pause, receive reps.

• CIMBS drills (60–90 sec): Co-activate steadiness + courage while inhibiting collapse/shame. The body learns, “I can feel something hard and stay organized.”

Sessions 4–8: Map & Experiment

• CBT loops: Draw the chain; pick one link to change today.

• Compassion breaks: Melt self-criticism so experiments stick.

• CIMBS stacking: Bind each new behavior to a felt resource (e.g., grounded legs, warm chest) to make it retrievable under stress.

Sessions 9–12: Generalize & Future-Proof

• Stress inoculation: Rehearse tougher scenarios while anchored.

• Attachment in the wild: Clear asks + time windows for responses.

• Relapse plan: Early cues (sleep, appetite, “always/never” thoughts) + a prewritten 90-minute reset (below).

Why This Works (the simple model)

 🎯 (Targeted circuits → durable change)

• Polyvagal calms defensive circuits so the thinking brain can engage.

• Attachment turns relationship into a regulating resource.

• CBT converts insight to experiments that build evidence for a new story.

• Self-Compassion lowers shame and rumination so learning consolidates.

• CIMBS times and stacks these so healthy networks fire together long enough to wire together.

Your 14-Day Starter Plan

 📅✅ (Small steps, repeated)

Daily (10 minutes)

1. 2 min 4–6 breathing

2. 2 min body scan (find one “okay” spot)

3. 3 min CBT micro-task (one step, not five)

4. 3 min compassion break

Twice Weekly (30–45 minutes)

• Practice a secure bid with someone you trust: clear need, specific ask, time-boxed request. Track body before/after.

Weekly (45–60 minutes)

• A guided CIMBS-style session (with me or your therapist) to co-activate resource circuits while you rehearse one real-life behavior immediately afterward.

Try the 90 minute reset.

90 minute reset

Work with Me (and support your foundation)

 📬 (Reach out)

If you want a plan that blends CIMBS + Attachment + CBT + Polyvagal + Self-Compassion for your life, reach out at www.healthandexerciseprescriptions.com We have a great referral network. For adjunctive support like sleep, stress, and micronutrient foundations, explore my curated Thorne store: https://www.thorne.com/u/HealthAndExercisePrescriptions. (Supplements don’t replace therapy or medical care; choose with your clinician.)

Disclaimer

This content is educational and not a substitute for diagnosis, treatment, or emergency care. If you’re in crisis, call or text 988 (U.S.) or contact local emergency services. Always consult your licensed clinician before changing your mental health, exercise, or nutrition plan.

Author Jaime Hernandez LMT, MES, CPT.

Thank you for your time and energy… Be well.